Awesome.
I wonder what life will be like tomorrow?
Well, in any case, it's been absolutely wonderful. I'm just wasting a little bit of time on the computer before I hit the books. I know that this is very theraputic- writing things down, I mean.
And I'm glad to write, because... it's cathartic. Another word for theraputic I guess. I don't know- I heard it in one of my classes, and I pretend that I know what the word means when a co-student bleets it out. All this college "Smart talk".
I don't know how much longer I'll be able to keep up my facade. I think the time is coming when people realize I'm not so intelligent, and they throw me out of town. The other day I was listening to people talk about "Academic Writing", which is quickly becoming a way of the past as we near the future... And I have a vague idea of what it is- it's what I can't do- which is to sound smart.
It's not a huge goal of mine, anyways.
I thought it interesting.
Well, I've been thinking about a few things.
One of which is time. I want to live life today: To do what I'm doing while I'm doing it and to be where I am when I'm there.
It makes sense! I know it does, because I can understand what I said.
But, truly- If i'm going to spend my nights studying I better put forth the effort, and put forth the time to do it. I had better see the project to the end. If I'm going to watch a movie with friends, I'd better enjoy the decision that I made, and enjoy my friends- not worrying if I did all the studying for that night. And that's the thing: I need priorities, and I need balance.
It's a good thing to have priorities in college. I wonder why guys get so upset with me when I tell them I have studying to do at the same time they invite me to go somewhere. They're in college, too! Don't they understand that just because they have free time, it doesn't mean that we all do! Especially not me.
Anyways, I hardly get 'me' time, so when there's a spare moment- you betcha I'm going to spend it selfishly on myself.
:)
Anyways, those come so sporadically, that it's hard to go on dates as it is. Of course, sometimes I just can't say no to a weekend date, and I end up going... The trick is saying yes when I don't have anything going on.
Another tangent:
It's just SO HARD to spend a 4 hour date with someone, regardless if it's the weekend or not!! BOYS: Especially on the first date- Keep it short, and sweet. It's so ridiculous to spend 4 hours with someone I hardly know. What's supposed to be small talk, just "scratching at the surface" turns into some huge self-disclosure session.. I then feel an obligation to this stranger- Then the next time I'm asked on a date, and I say no- {because I have other priorities... like school work which, I'm not sorry- I'm here to go to school, and that's my main focus! NOT to get my MRS degree}-
anyways, when I say no because of other commitments, there's this huge offense committed and they are unlikely to ask again.
THIS IS RIDICULOUS. Just pay attention to signals- you're not all idiots.
Plus on the date, I find that so much self-disclosure on your part is just overwhelming. It creates this panic inside me- because I don't want to be trusted with all this information! Of course I'm not going to blab away your secrets, since it was given to me in confidence- But when I'm thinking over the night's events, I'm definitely not thinking what a nice time I had with the boy I want to get to know more-
I fall asleep in a panic- about this luggage that's been given to me to carry around for awhile. Trust me, not cute.
It can get very distracting when I'm trying to focus on homework later that week and my mind wanders to your hideous situation.
What. the. Deuce.
Keep it to yourself. Keep me interested. Don't talk, and take me home.
Phew*
Alright, now that I went on about that, I might as well continue.
There's not much else to talk about- but I'll say one last thing about guys and dating:
Guys- If the girl isn't giving you the green light, give up. Please.
If you want the green light, become her friend, and make her interested. This may take time. Having one good first conversation doesn't mean get her number. Nor does it mean she wants to give you her number. Some girls are just flirtatious and friendly, some girls are just making polite conversation, some girls are getting another guy jealous, and some girls are bored. Very few girls are interested in you during that first conversation. Have a few run-ins with her, and see if a good conversation is possible again.
This way, a friendship and trust is developed. This way, she's more likely to give you green lights. This way, she will say YES without hesitation, to a date with you.
Pay attention to the green light.
When you take this beautiful, interesting girl on this date- keep it under 2 hours, please. We all have lives to get back to- schedules to meet. She has already cleared the night for you, so if the date goes well- and you're about to drop her off, maybe she'll invite you in to talk for awhile. And then it's a mutual want- a want to stay together just a little bit longer.
Then- no more than 20 minutes later, GO HOME.
Sigh.
I'm done. I feel like I've had a generous amount of dating experience..
This is my opinion, and this is how I prefer my dates to go- this is as an LDS girl in college, who isn't young enough to be naive about boys, but not aged enough to know everything.
This is what I know I like- My goal in talking about this is the hope that guys may get more dates... in the right way. It's hard enough as it is to start a relationship- It's more effective when one thinks about advice given, and tailor the information to what their dating style is.
It has been my experience that some guys are clueless. All they know is they think this girl is cute and fun, and want to spend time with her. BUT PLEASE- if you guys want to continue dating this fun, cute girl, you must be more controlled, and tactful. It can be such a painful, blunderous event when one isn't prepared.
Hey- preparation is half the battle. I know that when one is prepared, they are confident. And confidence is attractive. SoO attractive! It means the guy 'knows' what he's doing. It's kind of cute when boys are new at the dating game and clueless... but please, it gets old. Those guys that are clueless- they only get so far. Basically as far as the deep end of the 'friendship pool'. In the relationship water park, this is the mother of all kiddie pools. Congratulations, Newby.
So, get your experience and prepare yourself. Then all things shall work out for your good.
Guys, sometimes girls are mean as well. I've had my moments.
This will become the topic of a future post: THE PROBLEM(S) WITH FEMALES- A WOMAN'S PERSPECTIVE.
Watch out:)
Love ya'll.
Sarah Michelle
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